Life’s A Book… Let's live more than once.

Life’s A Book… Let's live more than once. 

I am 81 reaching soon 82. What could be 'the' theme, an important one in my life now? 

It is to 'Deal With The Fastness Of Life'

Investing money, there’s enough I have done.

Since a thought pop up again and again and again, the phrase started popping up in my head. Not just when considering investments, but all the time. As it turns out, moving slower is a great philosophy in all walks of life. Isn't that so?

I had often been asked about how I remember the material for my college exams so quickly. I never wondered. I often try to memorize it just once, but properly. Most of my thoughts were for sure, clear. I could easily scroll through them, skim and highlight.

Now “How can I say a matter in one sentence?” and then create a 20-page summary. It takes a week to complete, but when I have done, I have already read, filtered, written, and memorized most of what I need to know and remember.  It’s not pretty difficult, and it works.

Let's 'Move slower'.

Just like at work, most of our food culture, often and especially these days, is designed to be fast. Come fast, eat fast food, proceed fast.

Now, let's try this: "Take a bite, then lay our hands flat on the table. We’ll instantly chew slower. It gives us time to think about what we’ve eaten, enjoy how it tastes, and we’ll need less to feel full. 

Let's 'Move slower'.

Washing utensils in the kitchen. Some friends use to make fun of me because I like doing the dishes. They think it’s a mundane, mindless activity. To me it’s the exact opposite. 

There’s a famous Zen story about it:

A monk told Joshu: “I have just entered the monastery. Please teach me.”

Joshu asked: “Have you eaten your rice porridge?”

The monk replied: “I have eaten.”

Joshu said: “Then you had better wash your bowl.”

At that moment the monk was enlightened.

After you’ve eaten, cleaning up is the next step. If you let it be, it can be a meditative, restorative practice. Just like any physical next step. Let me rinse and swirl as long as I need to. There’s no need to rush. Let life flow for a few minutes. 

Let's 'Move slower'.

Gut decisions often twist the stomach.

When we’re young, we used to quickly jump into relationships of all kinds, righ? The first person we sat down next to in high school, the first coworker we went to lunch with, the first hotel visit with spouse after the wedding. As we get older we realize how scarce and valuable our time is, but, true that habit is hard to shake. There’s nothing wrong with commitment, but we don’t have to commit to anyone or anything on the spot. 

Let's 'Move slower'.

For most fortunes that last, we’ll find the money has piled up with similarly declining velocity. Even if we get rich really fast, there’s no way to ‘stay rich easily’ for ever. Generally, delaying financial decisions often makes them obsolete or at least their conditions a lot more favorable.

Let's 'Move slower'.

If our TV breaks down and we must wait until when to buy a new one. We might realize by then we don’t need one at all. Instead of a mortgage today, get a raise in 6 months. When the market dips, wait to see if it dips some more. Move slower.

Remember how "The Tortoise Beat The Hare"! This is what "Moving Slow" is about. Taking the time to think, make good choices, and then give fortune the time it needs to support them. The hare lost against the tortoise not because it expended too little effort, or because it took a break, but because it stopped moving altogether.

Let's 'Move slower'.

The one thing 'Move slower' is not, however, an excuse to postpone choices indefinitely. Let's make decisions deliberately, but once we make each one, let's do it with our whole heart and soul.

Let's "Move Slower", but keep moving.

Life’s A Book…

…but only readers and thinkers live more than once. 

Common sense is indeed Rare

Common sense is indeed Rare

Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool, so I gave him a glass of water.

- I changed my password to "incorrect" so whenever I forget it the computer will say, "Your password is incorrect."

- Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

- I'm great at multi-tasking--I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.

- If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

- Doesn't expecting the unexpected mean that the unexpected is actually expected?

- Take my advice — I'm not using it.

- Hospitality is the art of making guests feel like they're at home when you wish they were.

- Television may insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.

- I bought a vacuum cleaner six months ago and so far all it's been doing is gathering dust.

- Every time someone comes up with a foolproof solution, along comes a more-talented fool..

- If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you'll have trouble putting on your pants.

- A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

- Ever stop to think and forget to start again?

- When I married Ms. Right, I had no idea her first name was Always.

- My wife got 8 out 10 on her driver's test--the other two guys managed to jump out of her way.

- There may be no excuse for laziness, but I'm still looking.

- Women spend more time wondering what men are thinking than men spend thinking.

- Give me ambiguity or give me something else.

- He who laughs last thinks slowest.

- Is it wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly?

- Women sometimes make fools of men, but most guys are the do-it-yourself type.

- I was going to give him a nasty look, but he already had one.

- Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

- The grass may be greener on the other side but at least you don't have to mow it.

Grandparents Yesterday, Today And Tomorrow

Grandparents Yesterday, Today And Tomorrow Grandparents Yesterday, Today And Tomorrow If anyone had told us, some years ago, that, someday, as a GF (or my wife as a GM), I would spend part of our time at computer, on a thing called "the Internet," chatting about my life and family with hundreds of total strangers, I would have laughed and thought they were "crazy!" ... Yes, here I am doing it! Save, Social Networking ... Any substance ... in Free Basics or Net Neutrality ... (market product of govt Masala ...!) [spying by market or govt]. Anyway, if Net becomes FREE, say, upto 50 MB ... Well and Fine... So now I'm wondering what changes will take place in the future - and what some future VS, will ruminate of what we talk about here and how we go about it. Will GP (grandparent) caregivers, like me, be a thing of the past or the absolute norm? Will the "family" look much as it does, today, with all the variations it's already experiencing? Or will it have taken on such a new shape that the conversations on sites like this will be entirely different? Will we even still communicate with each other in this way? Or will technology have brought us whole new forms of contacting each other that we can't even imagine right now? As a GM, my wife always recall when the electronic typewriter was the most modern piece of equipment in the family. Now it seems quite "primitive." Will our ways of communicating seem just as archaic to some future reader? And as much as I hate to say it, will 'this material' (the 'rubbish', I pour out, here and in Media) even still be here? Or will it have disappeared as the technology became outdated and newer types of communication took over? Regardless, I expect I'll be talking a lot about changes, as I write here and in a many a blog - those that I underwent as I took on the caregiver role and those I've gone through and am still going through as my role, itself, evolves. But with these kinds of questions in my mind, I almost can't help addressing myself to that possible future, as I write, as well as, of course, those of you who are reading here and now. That is, if this bla .. bla .. is even still here in the far future and if any reader, at that time, is even interested in what's said by an 'oldy' from the early 21st Century!

A bird in the bush seems better!

A bird in the bush seems better!

The sharp drop in the rate of interest on FDs on which those seniors who have no income from pension or other sources depended in the past, a 100% or more inflation presented to us as only 5-6% during the past 3-4 years, leaving the banks free to fleeeeece the depositors by introducing new charges for every banking activity which did not exist before, including the failure to maintain a minimum balance in the PM’s scheme for every Indian to have a bank account with no requirement for a minimum balance, and the depositors’ money not being safe anymore, forcing a digital culture in a country dominated by the illiterate, without a feasibility study, demonitization, without any warning or legal procedures,  which caused havoc and took the lives of  more seniors than ever before in history, leaving the healthcare in the country in a disarray and in the hands of the corrupt, leaving the police in the country to work 24x7 to fine two-wheeler drivers driving without a helmet (and now with a half helmet), instead of catching the bank looters and preventing them from leaving the country, is a recipe for disaster.

 The farmers - the "annadatAs" are still committing suicide and the poor are still going to bed hungry.

 The hungry cannot eat the progress reports on the initiatives, published in both print and electronic media for which crores of rupees are being spent. The poor want just two square meals, which they did not have before and they do not have even today.

Reckless conjecture is all we've......

Reckless conjecture is all we've...... 

Does 'Uncertainty' make life interesting and thrilling;

while 'Predictability' makes it?

At best we've a judicious combination of both! Nothing more!

Reckless conjecture is all we've. It’s practically our species’ national pastime. Evidently, a governing principle of the condition of the elderly is that we are not allowed to know, existentially speaking, what the hell is going on. But at the end of the cosmic day, a single practical question remains: 

The Supreme Court has questioned mandatory use of Aadhaar for drawing pension by retired government employees, saying they are former staff of government and their identity is not under doubt. Stressing that there has to be a robust system to ensure that nobody is deprived of his or her dues, a five-judge Constitution bench, headed by Chief Justice Dipak Misra, said pension accounts are operated by retired employees only and hence, there was no question of any impersonation.

How would it be a case of fake identity? The bench adds, that forcing such employees at the age of 70 or 80 to go for Aadhaar would fall under the ambit of "exclusion".

The bench raised the issue of retired persons settled abroad. Pointing out that as per rules, only Indians can enrol for Aadhaar, it said, "The government has to ensure that non-resident Indians can get the pensionary benefits as they cannot apply for Aadhaar."

Attorney General K K Venugopal said change is an ongoing process and the law may be suitably changed to iron out such "glitches" and issues. Moreover, the law should have the provision to deal with such contingencies, he said.

The bench took strong note of the submission that no such affected retired staff has come to the court, and said, "Constitutionality of an issue cannot be tested on the basis who has to come to court".

On data safety, Venugopal said the Aadhaar "data centre" is protected and kept at a place which is surrounded by 13 ft high and five ft wide walls.

At the end of the day it appears that nothing happens at random!

Listening - A sincere form of respect

Listening - A sincere form of respect

"Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply." 

--Stephen R. Covey

We can at best respond and not react.

"The most sincere form of respect is actually listening to what  another has to say" - Bryant McGill. 

Respect means you listen to one another - without listening, there is no true respect. Respect only happens in most relationships.

We have two ears and one tongue so that we would listen more and talk less. This was our moto in giving counseling senior citizens in trouble. 

If only we make listening and observation as a habit, we stand to gain much more than we can by talk.  And most of the successful companinship volunteers with Dignity Foundation are the ones who do more listening than talking.

Listening is a magnetic and strange thing, a creative force. The friends who listen to us are the ones we move toward with. When we are listened to, it creates us, makes us unfold and expand.

Everything in writing begins with language. Language begins with listening. There is as much wisdom, if not more, in listening as there is in speaking--and that goes for all relationships, not just our elders in distress, but even romantic youth.

What is "Respect", after all. One of the most important words and meanings of life. Respect is of utter most importance if we want to have a good life. The big question is what respect is. I know a lot of people misplace respect with fear. In my own personal opinion fear and respect are two completely different things.

At the very outset of its teachings, the GItA illuminates to us the nature of life and challenges it throws before us:

● Life is a field of action, sometimes a battlefield, making us confront challenges and crises. It should be fought or resolved on the basis of the right values. 

● In Sri Aurobindo's words, "the field of human action" is "the field of evolving Dharma". Evolving Dharma essentially implies emerging into a larger life-supporting, life-enhancing value-system.

● If one can ensure the right course of action, there is no need to remain caught in the weaknesses of mind and heart. Whatever the severity of the challenge or crisis, we must rise up to face and resolve it. As Krishna exhorts Arjuna: "Shake off the petty weakness of heart and arise (to meet the challenge)..."

● The challenge becomes more severe when we are not able to decide the right course of action. In the words of the Gita, when our "whole consciousness is bewildered in its view of right and wrong". In such a situation all our energies and strengths are confounded as they don't find a focused and well-directed outlet. Such a situation calls for not only a thoughtful analysis but also a meditative-intuitive exploration into the essential nature of the challenge as well as one's own fundamental nature and its essential equipment to face the challenge.

The inherent message of the GIta is to connect with higher dimensions of consciousness and, thus, to move on to a higher sphere of peace, harmony and resolution."

The nature of a major challenge

The Gita addresses a major challenge and sets out to resolve it in the course of its teachings. If we understood the nature of a major challenge and all its factors, it would help us figure out how to face them as we set out to resolve them.

A major challenge might usually involve a major value crisis with:

● No clear course of action available to focus all one's energies at and to act with a singular will.

● An experience of both success and failure. One may lose on certain counts, gain on others. A mindset caught in the desire for success and the fear of failure is not equipped to face a major challenge with potentially vast and varied consequences. What we need is to concentrate energies, integrated strengths of mind, heart and body and a clear sense of direction and a firm sense of determination to tread the path open ahead and to hew new ones. 

Hence the GItA advises one to act with all strength invested into action with all sense of self rooted in one's true sense of being -- free of all desire for success and fear of failure.

Connecting with higher dimensions of consciousness

To resolve a major challenge or crisis, the inherent message of the GItA is to connect and associate with higher dimensions of consciousness and, thus, to move on to a higher sphere of peace, harmony and resolution.

Krishna-Arjuna relationship

This relationship essentially describes how to connect and associate with a high problem-solving, crisis-resolving, peace-harmony-resolution-attaining domain of higher consciousness and reality.

● The greatest advantage Arjuna has in his extreme crisis is his friend, philosopher and guide, Krishna, accompanying him and leading him through the turbulence that has weakened not only his mind and heart but also his body. But the Arjuna-Krishna relationship is far too deep to be treated as a merely external relationship.

● In its spiritual symbolism, Arjuna, who represents a human self, mind and consciousness, has to connect at a deeper plane with a higher self with its cosmic and transcendental dimensions of mind and consciousness, represented by Krishna.

The essential message of the Gita:

On how to face a major challenge (which might involve a major crisis as well as a major conflict) is very profound. To sum it up, all our efforts at crisis and conflict-resolution, whether inward or outward, should be guided with the following approach.

To see :

* life as the Field of Right.

* To see challenges and crises as means to evolve into a higher harmony.

* To learn to grow into pure and total observation of the outward crisis as well as the inward crisis-ridden sense of self.

* To set out to resolve all our differences and conflicts with deep faith that all life is one and connected...

* To enter into all effort at crisis- and conflict-resolution with deep love and compassion for all...

Finally, if one has a firm hold on these fundamental values it follows that one will have a deep aspiration to serve a larger good, have an integral faith in an all-loving, all-compassionate Grace, and will be sure to have an intuitive grasp of the situation and an inner sense of clarity to deal with it.

Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you'd have preferred to talk. In fact, The most sincere form of respect is actually listening to what another has to say.

"The art of conversation lies in listening." --Malcom Forbes

Subrahmanian S.H.

I am old and living alone, What if?

Altho’ I am old and living alone,

Lonely I will never be.

I simply won’t allow it.

I shall talk to myself this way:

“You have books to read, eyes to see,

A  phone to call a friend"

Nothing in TV to watch....?

Let us 'Go for a walk' 

Think about those who are blind,

Unable to do any of these....?

Have you forgotten your blessings?

Remember them, please.

If life is a game, these are the rules. 

There are no mistakes, only lessons.

No matter how your heart is grieving, 

if you keep on believing, 

the dream that you wish will come true.

"There is a tide in the affairs of men which taken at the flood 

leads on to fortune. Omitted, all the voyage of their lives is 

       bound in shallows and in miseries".

-- Shakespeare